Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I puked a lego.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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