Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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