do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize