His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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