He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
