You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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