Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
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