so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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