i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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