i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Randomize
