I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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