Who wears a wallet chain?!
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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