..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
