I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
