What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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