You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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