Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
