tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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