it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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