Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize