Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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