Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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