All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Randomize