let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
