pedialite and red bull = repair kit
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
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