he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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