can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
It's never too late to be topless.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
