I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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