You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
