it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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