If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
