yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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