I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize