I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
they need to just BURY HIM!
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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