Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
