she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
My breasts were aching with rage.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Randomize
