We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Randomize
