I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
