I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
