This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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