He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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