That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize