I need help removing her.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
