question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
It's never too late to be topless.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
