Nicole vs. Life
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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