just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize