Its about making memories worth repressing
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
