You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
