dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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