winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
