so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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