She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
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